Etiquette Rules For Wedding Thank-You Cards


From the moment you announce your engagement, you can expect the stream of gifts to start flowing, some from your family and friends, others from your workmates, and even social media followers. 

Understandably, you may find it easier to forward a generic “thank you” text to all gift senders and possibly even forget to thank some of them.

And that’s all wrong….

Wedding etiquette rules state that you should send a personalized, hand-written thank-you note to everyone who was thoughtful enough to send you a wedding present. These rules are not set in stone but are simply for etiquette purposes. 

Do You Need to Send Wedding-Thank You Cards?

Yes. It may take you a lot of time to do and even cost you a good deal of money (depending on how far your recipients are), but you need to thank all the people who sent you gifts, no matter how small. You should also send cards to all the guests who attended the wedding ceremony.

Fortunately, you don’t need to do all the designs and personalization on your own. The Knot has a great selection of thank-you cards, covering a wide range of themes and color schemes that you can select and subsequently customize to fit your needs. That way, the only thing you will need to do is write your words of gratitude and the recipients’ addresses.

Do You Need to Send Thank-You Notes for Every Single Wedding Event?

Yes. As mentioned before, you should aspire to send a thank-you note for every single gift you receive, whether before or after your wedding day and regardless of the event the gift was given at.

This means that if someone sends you a gift at your bridal shower and another one at your wedding, they should receive two separate thank-you cards acknowledging each gift. 

The only event you aren’t obligated to send out gratitude cards for is the bachelorette party. However, you may want to send out some cards if your friends brought special gifts.

To avoid having a huge backlog, you need to start sending out the cards as soon as you get the first gifts and write a card right after you open every gift. 

What Do You Say in Your Wedding Thank-You Cards?

Expressing your gratitude in words may not be as easy as it sounds, especially if you have to do it so many times. So, here’s a simple template to use as a guide:

  1. The Address – Your card or note should start with a personalized salutation, where you address the recipient by their name. This is necessary and shows that you truly appreciate their generosity.
  2. Acknowledgment for Their Presence – Thank the guest for honoring your invitation and attending the event in the first paragraph.
  3. More on The Gift – In the second paragraph, mention and acknowledge the gift you received and, if possible, touch on how you plan to use it. This shows the sender that all their efforts were not in vain.
  4. Conclusion – How you conclude the card depends on your relationship with the gifter. It may be formal like “With profound gratitude” or more playful like “send my love to your mams, x.”

If you’re still not sure how to draft your notes, here are a couple of letters and templates you can use for inspiration.

When is The Right Time to Send Out Thank You Cards?

Ideally, you should not take more than two weeks to send gratitude notes for all gifts received before the wedding. 

It may be hard to do so, considering all the planning activities you are likely to be involved in at the time, but then again, not many people send their gifts before the wedding day.

For all the gifts you receive on or after your wedding date, your thank-yous should not take more than three months after the wedding. It may not be the end of the world if you send your cards out late, but it may be judged by some to be a sign of ingratitude.

Can You Send Digital Cards?

Digital stationery and virtual RSVP cards are increasingly becoming many couples’ go-to options for thank-you cards, mainly for their convenience but also for their eco-friendliness. 

As much as your gifters will not throw a fuss when you send them such cards, classic, hand-written cards remain most people’s favorites, as they have a more personal touch.


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